


Floating

by CalicoPudding



Series: Free Fall [2]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst, Canon Divergence, Conflict Resolution, Depressed Kuroko Tetsuya, Depression, Kuroko Tetsuya & Momoi Satsuki Friendship, aomine gets his shit together, so does kuroko
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-22
Updated: 2016-03-22
Packaged: 2018-05-28 07:33:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6320233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CalicoPudding/pseuds/CalicoPudding
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroko was tired. Aomine refused to let him slip again. Companion/Epilogue to Free Fall, rated for language</p>
            </blockquote>





	Floating

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, not gonna lie, I was legitimately contemplating a horrible ending for this. But then I realized I'd much rather write a fix it to my own story so I hope this works.  
> Real quick! If you've not read Free Fall yet, go do that, otherwise none of this will make any sense.

He knew what was going on, and he hated that he couldn't bring himself to do anything about it.

Aomine Daiki was fighting a war with himself. One side, the bigger side, only wanted to leave Tetsu to himself, the smaller boy wasn't his concern anymore. But the other part, the middle school one he kept tucked away, whispered that the other boy needed him, it mourned their fallout and it wailed on the day that Satsuki said he quit basketball.

Aomine was on the roof, half way dozing, his thoughts keeping him up. Satsuki was with Tetsu, she'd left practice with a sad smile on her lips. She was really the only reason he wasn't talking to Tetsuya, she was his excuse. Because as long as he had Satsuki to help him, Aomine could remain uninvolved. So when he found her at the front gates, crying, obviously having not gone to see Tetsu, an alarm bell blared to life.

"What happened?" he asked.

"I can't," she sobbed quietly, keeping her face buried in her hands, "I can't keep doing this, he's not talking anymore, he won't listen to anyone. He doesn't seem bothered that his team doesn't notice him anymore- I think he's gone, I can't do this anymore."

* * *

Dropping to the floor seemed like a really enticing idea before he actually did so. When he hit the ground, bag falling from his shoulder on the way down, he felt the dull beat of pain drum to life in his chest and his knees, he regretted his decision. But he didn't want to move either. Kuroko lay on the floor, content to stare at the wall opposite him.

It had been a long day, more trying than any other thus far, and all Kuroko wanted to do was sleep. He wasn't entirely sure if tomorrow was a school day, he didn't want to take out his phone to check the date, that took effort. On the way to school, he'd been jostled by approximately fourteen people, and very nearly fell in the street. He'd taken his usual seat behind Kagami in class and he'd worn a small smile when the other boy showed no sign of noticing him. That was good, the knowledge that they'd all moved past him, it was nice.

After an hour, his stomach reminded him that he did in fact need to eat something. His already minuscule appetite had diminished even further, and for the most part, he actually forgot about eating. But after a couple days, his stomach would cramp up and remind him. Pushing himself up from the floor, he shuffled into the kitchen to find something that might stay down. Tea was a given, he'd been drinking a lot more of it since the last game with Aomine, it made him feel warm inside, which was comforting.

Leaning against the counter, he drank two cups of tea and managed to eat a handful of crackers. He nursed a third cup and waited for the sun to go down.

When it got dark, Kuroko set his cup in the sink and made his way to his room, stripping out his clothes and picking up a loose pajama shirt from where he'd left it on his bed. Sleep sounded like a good idea, such a good idea. He rolled onto his stomach and slowed his breathing, falling asleep in seconds.

He was woken some time in the early morning and took a bleary look at his alarm clock to see what time it was. There was some kind of sound coming from outside his apartment, that must have been what woke him up, but he wasn't quite awake to process it. After a few minutes, his head cleared up.

The last thing Kuroko expected at four o' clock in the morning was the angry torrent of knocking at his door. He ignored it at first, content to pull his pillow over his head, hoping that it was just some drunkard who'd stumbled up to the wrong door. But after five minutes, it didn't go away.

He really didn't want to get up, getting up required effort, something he reserved for going to school. But he also really wanted to sleep and that wouldn't happen unless the noise disappeared. He wrestled with his thoughts for a minute before the need for sleep won out.

With a tired groan, he slowly rolled out of bed and shuffled himself down the hall. He fumbled with the lock for a moment, prepared to tell whoever it was that he very much needed sleep and that they should leave, thank you very much. He managed to get the door open without falling over and took a breath to speak before promptly shutting the door again, standing frozen a moment.

They'd given up. Momoi had. Kagami had. Kise had. He knew they gave up. He knew when Momoi stopped her usual text attacks and only sent him a 'good morning' every other day. He knew when Kagami passed back a paper and didn't bother to turn around. He knew when Kise stopped coming by to read books and binge eat.

So why was Aomine at his door?

* * *

It was three thirty five in the morning when Aomine made his decision. He made it to Tetsu's apartment a little before four o' clock and began knocking on the door, not caring in the slightest if the boy was asleep. He didn't know why he was pursuing this so vehemently, but there was something about seeing Satsuki brought to tears by the boy she fell in love with that pushed him.

After five minutes of knocking, the door opened. Tetsu stood there and his face showed surprise and confusion behind a thin mask of indifference before he shut the door. Aomine would be lying if he said he was surprised. He knew that the door would be opened again, so he waited. There was no noise to be heard but Aomine could picture him on the other side of the door, still as stone, thoughts whirling through his head faster than anyone could comprehend.

A few heart beats of quiet passed before Tetsu opened the door, he was half hidden behind it. They stood there for what felt like a lifetime before Aomine's resolve snapped.

"What's going on, Tetsu?" he asked, voice steely. He stared into the smaller boy's flat eyes, searching for a glimmer of something, anything.

It was a stupid question, he knew that. Tetsu was depressed. Before, he only held his emotions back, but now, they were gone, either lost or gotten rid of so he wouldn't get hurt. Tetsu was empty, and it was all his fault. Well, maybe not all of it, but a great deal of it. Maybe if he'd attempted to reconcile with him after that game...but he hadn't, there was no changing that. In that parting game at Teiko, he'd forgotten that Tetsu was there, and he knew that the boy had noticed. He hadn't been able to face him after that, and as the time passed, he stopped caring.

The empty husk of his former friend gave a half hearted shrug and opened the door wider in question, did Aomine want to come in?

He did, but he hesitate in stepping past the threshold. Tetsu remained silent and only closed the door behind him. Aomine stood there, grasping for words, willing Tetsu to be the first to speak. But he only stood there, eyes slowly growing dim.

"Satsuki was crying," Aomine blurted, because what else could he say?

Slowly, Tetsu blinked, his hand twitched once, and his toes flexed against the floor, but he said nothing.

Aomine was getting angry. Angry at Tetsu for being unresponsive and hurting Satsuki, no matter that it was unintentional. Angry at Satsuki herself for waiting to tell him just how bad the situation had gotten. Angry at himself because he should have noticed back in middle school and stopped it before it started. He stood there, feeling rage spreading through his body, staring at the blank boy before him. Something glimmered in Tetsu's eyes, it was momentary, Aomine thought he imagined it.

"I'm tired," Tetsu's voice was rough, scratchy from disuse. But there was so much in those two words. His voice was that of a man who'd let everything bleed away, and was content with the state of things. There was something else that he couldn't place. But had Tetsu really accepted the situation?

Aomine didn't know what to do, emotional support and problem solving wasn't his forte, it never had been. Having Tetsu in front of him, looking drained, dead, nearly swallowed up by his baggy sleep shirt, Aomine wanted to punch him in hopes of solving the problem. They were going to have to talk, he was going to have to force Tetsu to talk otherwise nothing would be accomplished. But he had to get Tetsu out of his apartment.

"Put some clothes on," he said at last, pouring all of his authoritative power into those four words. It must have worked to some degree because Tetsu fidgeted a moment before sighing and disappearing into his room. Aomine half expected him to fall asleep once he was there, it was four in the morning after all, but he reappeared in sweatpants and a long sleeved shirt.

It wasn't terribly cold outside, but Aomine saw Tetsu shiver when he locked the door. They walked a short ways away, and it dawned on him that he'd really rushed as quick as he could to see Tetsu before the sun was even up.

He stopped as they approached an empty park and dropped himself onto a bench. Tetsu followed suit, tucking his legs up to his chest.

"Tetsu," Aomine said, "talk to me."

* * *

Kuroko found his mind wandering. Why had Aomine showed up? Come to think of it, why had Kuroko listened to him? There was a slight breeze outside, he regretted not putting on a thicker shirt. Oh well. His eye lids drooped but a small gust of wind sent shivers up his spine, snapping him awake. He wanted to go back to his apartment, he was so tired. Had he eaten anything recently? He couldn't remember. Maybe he'd eat something then, that would be a good accomplishment, if he could keep it down of course. Yeah, that sounded like a good plan. Eat and then sleep. He just really wanted to sleep, he doubted there was school tomorrow, maybe he could sleep all day. Once Aomine left him alone of course.

Aomine.

Was he still talking?

"Tetsu!"

Kuroko blinked sluggishly and lifted his head from his knees.

"Geez, were you listening?"

He shook his head.

"Damn it, Tetsu, this isn't easy. Satsuki is at her wits end and you won't tell her, or your team, what the hell is going on. So, tell me everything."

That required energy though, Kuroko had already spoken to Aomine, what more did he want? Though, maybe he should tell someone, but did it have to be Aomine? Aomine who'd stepped on their promise and ground it into dust. Could Kuroko really blame him though? Aomine was a star, a brilliant one, and he outshone Kuroko with ease. Like Kagami. Kagami would definitely become great, and he'd achieve greatness faster if he wasn't dragging Kuroko behind him. His team to, they were winning, so he heard, they were doing just find without him. So, really, it was for the best.

"Tetsu!"

Oh, right, Aomine was talking. Kuroko let his mind turn over and he sighed, closing his eyes.

"I'm tired," he whispered.

A part of him wished, begged, prayed, that Aomine would understand. Kuroko was so tired, everything required energy. It took so much of him, he was beginning to run out. Was he glad that everyone was moving past him? Yes, there was no doubt. But the bottomless pit that had taken residence inside him was terribly inconvenient.

"I'm so tired," he repeated, turning his head so his face once again rested against his legs.

The air was still, Tetsu felt the overwhelming urge to cry, but he couldn't. Something was holding the tears at bay.

He faded out then, his mind refusing to process the fact that Aomine got him onto his back. He didn't notice that Aomine took him home, or that he set him on his bed. When his head set itself to rights, he was underneath his blanket, Aomine sat near his legs, reading monotonously from one of the books Kuroko hadn't touched in ages. Not since Kise stopped coming by.

Aomine's voice was a low rumble and it lulled Kuroko into the deep sleep he'd been hoping to accomplish.

* * *

The next day, Kuroko woke to a low pain thrumming in his head. He could tell that he wasn't on his bed, that meant he was likely on the floor. His skill with memory had waned as he got worse, he couldn't quite remember what all had happened the night before. Aomine had shown up. Had he left? Why had he come again?

Something annoying was shouting at him, it sounded irate. After a few moments of weak focus, he translated the static into actual words and realized that Aomine was still present and yelling at him to wake up. Kuroko felt weightless for a moment as Aomine quite literally picked him up off the floor, and dumped him on his bed. They stared at each other for a while before Aomine sighed and settled his hand on Kuroko's head. He didn't ruffle his hair and Kuroko held his breath.

Aomine left moments later and when he heard the door shut, Kuroko fell face first onto his bed and cried.

By the time he was finished, his pillow was soaked and his face felt sticky. He dragged himself into the bathroom and nearly forgot to take his clothes off when he got in the shower. Not having the energy to stand up for so long, Kuroko sat down and turned on the water. He stayed there until the spray began to run cold and he fumbled to turn it off. Getting ready took longer, he sat on his bed, wrapped up in a towel, for fifteen minutes before getting halfway dressed and sitting for another ten.

Once he was dressed and his hair was dry, Kuroko took a half hour nap. When he woke up, he couldn't remember if Aomine had been there earlier or not.

Regardless, he felt as though the day might be okay, a bit lighter maybe since he'd cried everything out. For what reason though, he wasn't sure, it wasn't like him to cry so much. But he wasn't going to take an okay day for granted. He managed to keep down a more substantial breakfast and decided that it would be worth it to go to the library. He scribbled a note for himself and stuck it on the fridge, a reminder that he ate in case he forgot later, and slipped on his shoes.

Kuroko made it to the door when he got the impression he was forgetting something. He rummaged in his bag and patted down his pockets, trying hard to think of what it was. He had his keys, his past due library books, the money needed to pay the late fees, a water bottle, what else did he need?

Phone.

Right. It had been a while since Kuroko had actually used his phone. Everyone had stopped calling so much, and when they did, he didn't answer. But he figured it would be handy. If he got hurt somehow it would definitely be useful. He found it partially beneath his bed, it had half battery power and he supposed that was good enough.

All set, he locked the door behind him and began his walk to the library. Okay days meant he had more energy, it wasn't so trying to drift along down the sidewalk. Okay days were monumentally better than bad days. But he did want to have a good day, those were harder to come by though.

Oh well.

His walk to the library was blurred, he arrived on autopilot and forced a polite smile on his face as he went to return his books. The librarian jumped slightly but he only kept his smile in place, forcing words through his teeth. The exchange drained more of his energy so he made his way deep into the building, plucking books from the shelves at random before finding a secluded table. There was a vent just overhead, piping warm air directly at him, and he felt more at ease. He didn't retain much from the books as he read, the plot lines and names and imagery faded in and out. By the time two hours had passed, Kuroko had finished three books and didn't remember any of them. On the bright side, the uninterrupted quiet had replenished the energy he lost on the trip over.

He prepared to start another book when his phone vibrated in his pocket. Doubting it was anything more than a reminder to charge his battery, Kuroko ignored it. But then it went off again and he vaguely felt his face contort in confusion. Who texted him anymore?

_From: Aomine_

_Are you awake?_

_From: Aomine_

_Me and Satsuki are coming by, be ready in a half hour_

Kuroko dropped his phone, not hearing the ugly clatter it made as it hit the table top. Aomine was coming, and he was bringing Momoi along. Why would she come? She stopped visiting, stopped texting, he was glad that she had. So why? And what did Aomine want? Since when did he want to talk to Kuroko? Oh, wait. He'd been by the previous night, hadn't he? Had they talked? He doubted it, he didn't talk much anymore. But did he really forget Aomine coming by?

According to his phone, he had twenty minutes to get home before Aomine and Momoi arrived. He put the books back and slipped out of the library without a single head turned as he left.

He'd only been inside for five minutes when, what shouldn't have been, familiar knocking broke the silence. Kuroko shuffled over and opened the door just as the knocking took on a rather angry note. As expected, Aomine stood there, about to knock again, and Momoi stood behind him, a sad smile on her face that made Kuroko cringe.

"Let's go," Aomine said immediately. Kuroko must have looked confused, though that would have been hard to imagine due to the fact that he could feel his lips down turned into an almost frown.

Aomine huffed and tugged him past the threshold, producing a key from his pocket and locking the door.

"I copied your key last night," he explained offhandedly.

Kuroko prepared to muster up enough energy to respond but he was cut off as Momoi threw her arms around his neck. He stumbled back, fighting off the voice that told him that if felt nice, that he should lean in, should hug her back.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, hugging him tighter.

No. No. No. That wasn't right. She wasn't supposed to be sorry. She was supposed to fine without him. He'd made her feel even worse! He should have just told Aomine no, then Momoi would be fine again. Kuroko didn't want her to feel sorry. It was all his fault. All his fault. All his fault.

She moved back and took a step closer to Aomine, who pulled them both along, away from Kuroko's apartment.

* * *

It was hypnotizing, watching Kise dribble down the court. He was playing at a leisurely pace, unlike Aomine's blurring speed, so it was easier for Kuroko to follow with his eyes. Momoi sat beside him, holding his hand, rubbing circles into his skin. He doubted she knew what she was doing.

He was tired. He wanted to sleep, but Momoi had started crying so he agreed to come to the park with her and Kise. Aomine was off who knows where, so at least he didn't have to deal with his abrasiveness.

"Hey! Kuroko-chii! Look!"

He assumed Kise was trying to show him something impressive, a new trick he'd worked on. But it was too fast and Kuroko didn't have it in him to ask Kise to repeat it, so he just smiled. Kise positively beamed, as if Kuroko had just gifted him the world, and went back to his relaxed playing.

Kuroko didn't want to be out. He was taking up their time. He'd overheard from Momoi that Kise had messed up his leg, he shouldn't waste his valuable playing time showing off for Kuroko. He should be with his team or at physical therapy. And Momoi was surely busy, she had to keep Aomine in line and get her team in order. What were they doing? Why were they doing it?

He felt his shoulders slouch forward and Momoi's grip on his hand tightened.

* * *

After two weeks, Kuroko began to expect Momoi's texts before school. They all said 'good morning' to varying degrees, and though they forced a tired smile onto his lips, he felt incredibly guilty.

After four weeks, Kuroko found that his spare time was spent with Kise, or Aomine, or Momoi, or some combination of the three. Kise would read with him like he used to, or show off on the court at the park. He'd show Kuroko pictures from his modeling shoots and ask his opinion on them. If it was just Momoi, she'd take him somewhere, the library or just down the street to get a vanilla shake. Or they'd watch a movie together and Kuroko would find himself not minding her being there. It was incredibly draining regardless.

With Aomine, it was a little different. Kuroko was always left with a feeling that Aomine was holding something back. They didn't do much, and it wasn't often that it was just the two of them. But when it was, Kuroko would sprawl out on the floor and watch Aomine play video games. In the past few days though, they'd only sat together, not really speaking and not feeling the need to.

By a month and a half, Kuroko was starting to answer when he was spoken to. And it was then that Momoi dragged him to the park and he was met with Riko and Kagami.

He stopped short, unsure of what Momoi was planning, and why they'd agreed to come along.

They'd moved past him damn it.

Riko acted first, striding up to him, trying to appear calm and collected but he could see how her lip was wobbling and her hands were shaking. She stopped right in front of him and he regretted meeting her eye. Quick as lightning, she seized him by his shoulders and pulled him into a hug. She held him for what seemed like too long before she stepped back and punched him in the shoulder.

It hurt, but a little voice in the back of his head told him he deserved it.

Kagami was next and he only held out a fist, waiting patiently for what seemed like an eternity until Kuroko met his gaze and tiredly brought up his own fist, bumping them together.

* * *

The night dragged on, Kuroko was wide awake, his mind whirring but his body refused to move. His bed was comfortable but it was getting hot under the covers, he felt sweat forming, making his shirt stick to his back.

There had been a string of not-good-but-better-than-okay days and for that Kuroko had been grateful. He'd gone to the movies with Momoi and Riko, and gone to the park with Kise, Kagami, and Aomine. Though he'd not been up for joining them on the court, he sat and watched. Kise had him keep track of points, Kuroko knew it was unnecessary, but it was Kise's way of making him feel that he was at least contributing to their time together.

Kuroko didn't mind as much as he thought he would.

It only made sense then, that he'd have a bad day.

Bad days meant that he was nothing. Bad days were spent under the covers, not moving, not sleeping, sometimes forgetting that he needed to breathe. Bad days were the worst because he lost track of time and then had to spend his precious limited energy trying to figure out what exactly he had to do to catch up again.

He hadn't had a bad day in a while, Momoi had done a good job keeping him on his feet, doing things. When she was unable to, it fell to Riko and Kagami who were more than happy to spend time with him. Even when he didn't have the energy to keep up with them, they stayed. On somewhat-less-than-okay days, Kagami brought food and they'd laze about, or Riko would bring Nigou by for a little bit of play time.

_You're a bother_

Kuroko squeezed his eyes shut. Anything but that, please, he couldn't handle the grating voice that told him he was useless, that he was a burden, that they were just pitying him. It clouded into his head and took everything away. It echoed about, doubling in volume until he managed to scream it all away.

So that's what he did.

Kuroko sobbed into his pillow, letting out muffled scream after scream. His pillow was getting wetter and wetter and his throat was beginning to feel as though he'd gargled nails. But the voice hadn't gone away yet, and he continued to scream. He went on until a pair of hands landed on his shoulder and hoisted him up.

It was warm, not stifling like it was under the covers. He quieted down almost immediately, hiccuping in surprise after a scream died in his throat. The first thing he saw was Aomine's face, an expression there that was some cross between concerned and horrified. Kise was behind him, in the doorway, a white knuckled grip on the frame, a similar expression on his face.

"What the fuck was that, Tetsu?" Aomine's voice didn't shake, but Kuroko knew he was concerned. He would be to if he'd been the one to walk in on that.

Instead of answering, he just went limp. An apology danced on the edge of his lips but he couldn't make it heard. When that failed, he turned his face into Aomine's chest and continued to cry, but he kept it silent. Kise recovered while Aomine stayed frozen, carefully moving Kuroko so he could hold him instead. Kise's hand in his hair was enough to calm him down for good, surprisingly enough, and he fell asleep without explaining himself.

* * *

Kuroko didn't know if he should feel good about break. Break wasn't so exhausting, he could sleep more, whenever his mind allowed him to. That was good. But it also meant that everybody else had free time as well. And damn them if they weren't coming over every day trying to get him to just _do_ something.

He was feeling better, he knew that. He was having more okay days, even a few almost-good ones. But they'd been dotted by bad days, the worse bad days that he'd ever had and he felt they should be in a class all on their own. Dead days, maybe. Because that's how he felt.

He could cope, maybe, with those days. But there were times when he just wanted to be by himself. Not for any reason pertaining to the perpetual storm cloud in his head, but because he just needed to be alone sometimes.

And he told them as much, through a note he taped to his door.

* * *

It was an almost-good day when Kagami came over. The clock read five past noon and Kuroko was trying to figure out if he was hungry or not. Kagami solved that problem by holding up a bag of groceries and setting himself up in the kitchen.

"Aomine told me you probably didn't go shopping recently," he said by way of explanation.

Kuroko only shrugged and sat down on the floor because he was just a little bit tired. They made small talk, he noticed how happy Kagami was that he was responding, so he tried his best to chase away any long stretches of silence. Kagami did a better job, plucking out conversation topics from thin air, mostly talking about the team, asking if Kuroko might want to at least sit in on a practice.

Kuroko's only response was a half heart mumble that wasn't affirmation, but it certainly wasn't a decline to the offer.

When Kagami was finished, they sat down to eat and Kuroko spent a good three minutes simply staring at his food before actually putting any of it in his mouth. Not ten minutes into the meal, a knock at his door made him jump. Kagami got up without prompting to answer. It was somewhat of a surprise to see Aomine, Momoi, and Kise but he tried to smile at them.

It was then that he noticed just how much food Kagami had made.

Kise sat beside Kagami while Momoi and Aomine sat themselves on either side of Kuroko. Momoi had a brilliant smile on her lips, a nice light behind her eyes. Kise was trying to show him something on his phone, his voice the slightest bit too loud but he seemed happy. Aomine had slung his arm around Kuroko's shoulders, it was heavy, but there was something familiar about the feeling. His gaze flickered over to Kagami, though the boy appeared irate about Kise's yammering, he darted his eyes to Kuroko and smiled.

Everything was a little overwhelming, too much noise, to much sensory overload and he was still so tired.

He couldn't bring himself to care though. There was a feeling akin to 'nice' bubbling in his chest and the little voice that spewed talk of worthlessness was shut up for a little while longer. Kuroko didn't feel good necessarily, but he was certainly a little better than okay.


End file.
